2012 Year-in Review 2: The Search for More Readers

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All right the long awaited Anarchy Reigns has made it to American shores after being out in Japan for about a year! The semi-sequel to bizarre gore-fest Wii game Madworld featuring the combat style but put in a Power Stone environment. If you don’t know what Power Stone is then you probably aren’t as old or dorky as I am. Think Smash Brothers sort of but in a 3d level. Point is, Bayonetta is a pre-order character and the game is silly good fun especially with other people. Go buy it its like 30 bucks new at most places, even Gamestop! But I’ll shill later we’ve got more 2012 matters to fill time with!

Best Extremely short game: Asura’s Wrath
I talked about my love of Asura’s Wrath in a previous article and my points there still stand! I found this to be an enjoyable game and its difficulty level is easy enough for it to be accessible to most people. Its got to be cheap by now so go buy yourself a used copy. And then foolishly cough up money for the DLC to finish the story. Curse you, Capcom!

Goddamnit How Long Are You People Going to Keep Buying These Game?: Assassin’s Creed 3, Call of Duty, Madden
Madden at least has the excuse that its Football and doesn’t need to or can change each year and it’s really just a roster update but the other 2 have less of an excuse. It’s been the same thing with the other 2 for a while now and I’m wondering why you people aren’t burnt out on the same thing each time? Hell, I once ate cup ramen for 2 months straight and ended up blasting out a majority of my digestive system in the process. Short story shorter, I got sick of it and sought new food.

 

Not sure if its a giant chicken or a really friendly Cassowary

Not sure if its a giant chicken or a really friendly Cassowary

Most Welcome New Franchise: Dragons Dogma
In a previous article I stated my desire for such a game as Dragons Dogma and lamented my intense suckage at it. I was immediately reprimanded for my complaints and spit upon by the games sensible and friendly fanbase. It’s still a great game and I’m glad to hear another one is coming. I hope it adds a multiplayer option if you don’t want to use the companion system and just let you play it with your friends. Robots are great but I’m much more accepting of my idiot friends screwing up a fight than I am a robot. My friends rarely glitch and start spazzing out mid fight except for one who is prone to seizures but he should really stop playing games. The game borrows heavily from Monster Hunter in premise as well as Shadow of the Colossus in combat. I miss the colorful and silly style of Monster Hunter though but the monster design Dogma is pretty good while the humans and armor look a bit boring. But I guess that’s all part of Capcoms desire to look western these days. Sigh-desu.

Death will be as ostentatious as he wants to be!

Death will be as ostentatious as he wants to be!

Best Zelda Game: Darksiders 2
Runner Up: Okami HD
Darksiders 1 was a pretty enjoyable game. Darksiders 2 improves on it by quite a bit and I highly recommend it to all of you. Ok it wasn’t quite as Zelda like as the first one but it was still a nice action adventure game which sometimes feels like an underused genre maybe because of Zelda’s domination. Also there weren’t any unpleasant Wii controls to grapple with! Also Okami was rereleased in HD and is still jolly good fun and is about as long as a Final Fantasy game.

WHY, WHY CAN'T I GET INTO THIS?

WHY, WHY CAN’T I GET INTO THIS?

Best New MMO I Just Can’t Get Into: Guild Wars 2
Guild Wars 2 is a great game and deserves praise for not just being another goddamn WoW clone. It’s got a great selection of unique classes and races that aren’t just overdone Tolkien rip-offs. The combat is accessible and action based and many of WoW’s old problems were solved in wonderful ways, such as crafting and storing of crafting materials. However try as I might I just can’t seem to get into it. That doesn’t mean YOU shouldn’t try it. By all means give it a shot it’s great.

Worst New Direction for a Franchise: Lego Batman 2
Lego games were so easy that I almost hesitate to call them games. However they are so easy and enjoyable that I can play them with people who don’t play games and have a good time. Like Jell-O everyone loves Lego and seeing them pantomime out Star Wars and Indiana Jones made it hard not to smile a little at reenactments of the greatest moments from the series. Lego Batman 1 was a new direction since it wasn’t an adaptation of any specific movie or story but a Lego Batman communicating entirely through grunts of “hmm” was a joy in itself. Lego Batman 2, in addition to other changes, added voice acting which honestly kind of ruined the game. Pantomime gave the old games a sort of ageless appeal since it didn’t have cringe-inducing lines barely fit for garden variety kids shows. It’s not like the story was going to be complicated enough to merit voices. The other biggest problem was the words I dread seeing: Open World Gameplay. Sometimes that setting works but in this case it was a really cheap GTA rip off that was uncomfortable to interact with in any feasible way. Driving sucked, flying sucked and too much of the game demanded you explore the ugly, bloom heavy city.

Biggest Missed Opportunity: Mass Effect 3
I’ve already kicked around Mass Effect 3 as recent as last week’s article, and the issue has been done to death that the dead horse isn’t even horse pudding so much as it’s mashed through the ground. We all know the story by now and in order to prevent a future tragedy we must never forget that Bioware completely messed up what should have been a great and legendary ending to its flagship trilogy. Honestly had they just released what was in the Extended Cut DLC they could have dodged a huge majority of the flak they caught and we could all be complaining about better problems, like Kai Leng or Liara being shoved down our throats.
I’m sure I got at least one more of these year in reviews in me. And DmC drops next week and I just won’t have time to properly digest it in time for an article. STAY TUNED.

About Kimo Kuppe
Kimo is a contemptuous old coot. With experience in video games dating back to 1988 and a schizophrenic range of games he boasts an impressive range of knowledge of gamings best, and worst. Dwelling in the desolate wastes of the American Midwest he brings to Z1Gaming a perspective that looks for positive qualities in even the worst games.

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